My husband and I visited Sedona Arizona to attend a seminar on the Sedona Method. On day three, we spent much of the day in meditation. Afterwards, I was blissed-out.
We returned to our hotel. Then, I decided to cross a four-lane highway to visit a metaphysical bookshop. In my meditative haze, I walked a little close to a car zipping down the street. The driver blared her horn and sped by… or so I thought.
I arrived in the parking lot of the bookshop and the driver met me there. She had pulled a U-turn on the highway to come back and yell at me.
“Are you inebriated?” she shouted.
“Um, no, I’ve been meditating.”
She launched into a tirade about my shortcomings. I felt like I had put her in an awkward position, so I apologized three times. When the tirade continued, I said Namaste, bowed, and walked into the bookstore.
She followed me and continued to yell, surrounded by crystals, tarot cards, and books on conscious living. Finally, I politely told her I was done and we went our separate ways.
When I got back to the hotel, I asked my husband, “What do you think she wanted?”
“She wanted you to feel as badly as she does,” he said.
I didn’t comply with her wishes, because I didn’t feel badly – just puzzled and compassionate.
I’m not always as poised as I was with the woman who kicked my butt in a metaphysical bookstore. But I think of this incident when someone is upset with me. If I’ve done something wrong, I apologize. And if they want to continue the fight, I respectfully acknowledge that I don’t have to participate once I’ve apologized and made amends.
I call this teaching people how to treat me; or teaching them who I am – a flawed, wonderful, compassionate person who is willing to apologize but not willing to be kicked repeatedly for wrongdoing. Our willingness to hold this integrity affirms our worth and blesses everyone.
Is there someone in your life who needs a calm, kind lesson on who you are? Where do you find the poise to face difficult people with grace?